urgh. wad a fleeting sensation.

my mind is lke constantly swerving back to thots of him. lke seriously, wads e problem with mi? while he? hes like floating in and out of my life like he dunt care. he says he does, but seriously gurls. can u ever trust wad a guy claims himself to be?its kinda sickening u know. no, its veri sickening.yeah i told him tt. and he asked mi that question and i jus didnt know wad to ans anymore.all those things that happened, all e times we spent together. all e times we didnt. its gotten mi so messed up dammit. now im jus trying to hang on and see wad happens next. maybe eventually e chemistry wld jus die out. if he doesnt do anything by then. haiz. i relle dunno anything anymore.

and e worse thing is. all my frustrations and unhappiness bottled up over his simply uncaring nature dissipates e moment i hear his voice. im so useless my god. true, i wld try my best to sound as disconcerted and unconcerned as possible but yeah. u know i lke to giggle. and one giggle leads to many many giggles dammit.

we'll take things one at a time i guess.really slow. slower than e tortoise car i presume. i relle dunt wanna tink how it'll be lke if he doesnt *u know* anymore. my heart wld break into a million pcs, it really would.

cux he's e first that ever mattered.

tolerance was bliss, until 2003-06-22 11:35 p.m.